


Time

by The_Hawk_Eye



Category: Cobra Kai (Web Series)
Genre: Confessions, First Kiss, Hopeful Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Past Abuse, nothing extreme
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-04
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:07:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29204841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Hawk_Eye/pseuds/The_Hawk_Eye
Summary: "I have to ask," Daniel says suddenly. "Why would you let him... come back to your life?"  It is an honest question. There is no tartness or judgement in his words, just real doubt and concern.
Relationships: Daniel LaRusso/Johnny Lawrence
Comments: 9
Kudos: 78





	Time

**Author's Note:**

> I don't have a lot of time to write lately, but I have been able to finish this fic. I had the idea two weeks ago and wanted to write something uncomplicated but with some light angst. And finally, I finished this.
> 
> As always, English is not my first language, so sorry for the mistakes.

"I have to ask," Daniel says suddenly. "Why would you let him... come back to your life?" It is an honest question. There is no tartness or judgement in his words, just real doubt and concern.

_I don't know._

Johnny would love to say those words. He doesn't care if Daniel thinks he is a moron since that is much better than the truth.

_I thought he could change._

He would love to repeat those words out loud but he can't. Maybe is the alcohol running through his veins but he doesn't want to lie to Daniel. He doesn't want to say the truth either but it is fighting for being told. The reason why Johnny invited Kreese into his life, makes him feel ashamed and raises a second question that Johnny doesn't want to face.

"I'm not judging, I promise," Daniel adds. He sounds sincere and his eyes are begging for an answer to understand him better.

"He is... was" he corrects himself too late. "like a father to me." Even now, for Johnny, Kreese showed him some love and respect when he was a kid. "My father, my biological father, was..." he doesn't remember him very well, but he has the hazy memory of his hand grabbing his wrist while shouting and pushing him. "He didn't stick around for long." It is better to leave certain memories dying inside him. "Syd wasn't a great stepfather, it was obvious he didn't want me around. He married my mother to have a young beautiful woman around, not her stupid kid." Syd never hid his hatred towards him, much less when his mother wasn't around anymore. "And then, there was Kreese. He showed me love."

"Johnny that wasn't love." Daniel must be remembering their conversation about Miyagi and Kreese. He must be remembering all the good times with his father and Miyagi too. He doesn't understand him. How could he?

His father loved him.

Miyagi loved and respected him.

How could someone like Daniel to understand how he feels towards Kreese?

He showed Johnny some kind of love.

"It was love," Johnny stresses every word. "for me, it felt like love."

Kreese was the first father figure he had back then and even now, he believes Kreese loved him. It is difficult to explain.

"Miyagi sensei acted like a father. He took care of me and..."

"Syd didn't want to pay my karate classes at the beginning," Johnny cuts him. For some reason, he wants to share this with Daniel. "But Kreese took me to the dojo and taught me for two months without asking for a penny." That is one of his most joyful memories from his youth. "And one day, he went to my house to show Syd my potential and after that, Syd decided to pay for my karate classes." Johnny can't hide the smile. He was so happy. "Kreese didn't need another student or his money. Back then, the dojo was full of teenagers." He finishes his beer and asks for another. "He wanted me because he saw something."

Daniel seems uncomfortable. He can't believe Johnny's words. The Kreese he thinks he knows is incapable of caring for anyone. Johnny can sense his confusion. He only knows the Kreese who attacks and abuses people.

"He took me to the hospital once. I had an accident and cut my arm real bad, there was blood everywhere... and I hit my back so hard I couldn't move." Johnny doesn't remember the fall. Why did he fall that time? Was he doing something dangerous for Kreese? Was he trying to prove something to Kreese? He can't remember. "He tried to call my mother but she wasn't at home and he ended talking with Syd who didn't pay attention to Kreese. Shocking!" Johnny laughs a little bit. Syd has always been a piece of shit. "Kreese came to the hospital and stayed with me until my mother arrived. I have more stories about Kreese if you want to hear them."

Johnny hasn't talked about Kreese for decades, not even with the others degenerates. He has always felt ashamed for missing Kreese. That night he lost so much more than a stupid tournament; he lost a father because that was Kreese for him. He looked after him for years. Kreese made him strong and in that dojo, he found the people who would become his friends for life even when he didn't deserve them. Kreese hit him and made him do stupid and dangerous shit to prove he was a real Cobra Kai all the time. Kreese was ruthless and violent but he cared for Johnny. Kreese had moments of genuine affection and Johnny could feel it. Kreese put his trophies in a preferential spot and trusted him with his dojo when he had something to do. And sometimes, Kreese would tell him how proud he was of Johnny. And nothing will ever erase those moments. No matter what Daniel believes. That is why this situation is so painful for Johnny.

"That's why I let Kreese come back," Johnny answers his question.

Daniel drinks in silence without knowing what to say now. Obviously, he didn't know anything about what Johnny has just told him. For Daniel, Kreese is a sociopath incapable of loving and caring. And now, he realizes he never understood what Johnny was going through.

"He wanted me back," Johnny adds. "That night, he told me to come back... Robby wanted me there too."

They haven't talked about what happened that night before Daniel arrived. He guessed Johnny was there for the same reason that Daniel. However, he doesn't know what happened there. Johnny doesn't want to talk about how he ended being choked by Kreese; he just said he didn't lose the fight exactly, but nothing else has come from his lips.

"I doubted," Johnny confesses. "For a moment, I doubted because I knew I could have Robby back." That thought, that certainty, harasses Johnny since that night. "I... I haven't been a good father. I've failed Robby over and over again. I've never known how to be there for him and I never had the confidence... but now, for some reason, I believe I... I want to try. I want to fight to be there for Robby. And Kreese offered me that opportunity."

Johnny doesn't know why he is saying all this. He is not that drunk. He is in control of what he is saying but he doesn't want to stop. He is a shitty human being. And he has been the worst father a kid could have. However, that night Robby wanted him back to his life. He wanted Johnny. And that is thanks to Kreese. But Johnny had to say no. He had to say no to Robby and for the first time in his life, it was for a good reason. Kreese is destroying those kids and Johnny can't allow that. He has to stop Kreese and he has to find the way to be able to talk to Robby and save him. For the first time in his life, he understands his son and what he is going through. He knows what it is to have a shitty father and find solace and respect in Cobra Kai. Johnny knows what Robby is feeling and how grateful he must be feeling next to Kreese.

"Why are you telling me this...?" Now. He wants to ask why is Johnny telling him this now.

"You need to know what we're facing." Johnny shrugs. It is not the real answer but it will be enough for Daniel. Johnny wants Daniel to understand that not everything was bad with Kreese.

Johnny was not crazy when he trusted Kreese.

Robby is not crazy for trusting the man now. He is not an idiot.

Robby is just lost.

Robby has lived all his life dealing with a neglecting mother who, at least, was there; an alcoholic father who was never there when it mattered or when it didn't matter. Daniel has been there for him but after what happened, Robby must feel Daniel betrayed him. And out of the blue, Kreese appeared with hope and promises. And he is there building something new, making him believe a beautiful lie, taking advantage of a desperate teenager whose only wish has been to be seen and loved.

"I want you to know how Kreese traps you and makes you need him and love him." Daniel has to know how everything works. "For Robby's sake." When this is over, Robby will be the main victim. Johnny takes a sip of his beer. "He is a good kid."

"I know." Maybe, Daniel can't understand the nature of all this, but he knows Robby is a good kid.

Daniel looks at Johnny and tries to imagine what kind of life he has had since he was a child. Daniel has never tried to know Johnny, not even now. Daniel always saw Johnny as a bully, as a stupid rich boy who never cared about anything but himself. And he was all that: Johnny was a bully, he attacked him but Daniel is starting to see why he was like that. It is probably, that he was full of hatred and confusion about what love should be. Daniel has always been surrounded by people who loved him: his father, mother, Miyagi are just the first people he can mention, but not the only ones. His family is big and full of flaws, but they love each other even when they are doing something stupid.

Is it possible that Johnny never felt unconditional love until he meets Miguel?

Is it possible that Johnny didn't know how to show love until now?

Is it possible he didn't know what to do with his own feelings?

Daniel has never been afraid of showing what he feels and never crossed his mind anyone would have problems with something as simple as that.

Until now.

Johnny is not very vocal. He talks a lot about stupid shit but rarely about how he feels. Johnny can talk about karate and the students for hours, but not about how he feels. Daniel is not asking Johnny to open his chest to show him his heart but he could share more about how he feels now. And maybe, that is because he doesn't know how to share that. If that is the case, Daniel is going to pay more attention to him to read him better.

"Thanks for sharing this with me." He is thankful for the effort he has done. Daniel has been mad with Johnny since the day he saw Kreese again. The man is a monster who tried to kill him. And before that, he tried to choke Johnny and for the apologetic way Johnny acted, Daniel had the impression it wasn't the first time Kreese did anything to Johnny. And finally, he can understand a little better why Johnny never condemned Kreese abusive behaviour towards him.

"I just want you to know Robby is another victim."

Another victim like him, Daniel thinks but doesn't say it. It mustn't be easy for someone like Johnny to accept he was a victim. Saying no to Kreese must have been difficult. And it will be difficult for Robby.

"We will help him." It is a promise. And Daniel promises himself too that he will help Johnny because the man needs it.

They finish their drink and decide to go outside to have a walk and refresh before going back home. For a person who has been so old-fashioned for so long, Johnny is adapting very well in general, thanks to Miguel who has been training him to be a better person since they met. Johnny shows Daniel some pictures for the dojo and explains to him why they are good publicity. Daniel is impressed. And it is nice to be talking like this.

Since they started working together, Daniel has been knowing a new man who is fun and smarter than he looks by all the stupid things he usually does and says. Ali was right when she said they are more alike than he would like to admit at the time. They share a lot of interests and enjoy the same music. And Johnny can be effortlessly funny. Daniel loves spending time together. And now, he wants to show Johnny what a healthy relationship with another adult can be.

How must Johnny be feeling right now after that confession?

Johnny tries to ignore Daniel's eyes glued to him. He never wanted anyone's pity. He doesn't want to feel his pity. What happened, happened and it can't be changed. Furthermore, it is not a tragedy. He is fine. It is an obvious lie but he has been repeating the same lie for years. He is fine. He never wanted his father to come back. He didn't want a better relationship with Syd. And he doesn't miss Kreese around him to tell him how special he really is.

And Johnny wants nothing from those three men.

He is fine.

He is fine, Johnny repeats all the lies and fights to believe them with no doubt.

Suddenly, the only thing Johnny wants right now is to be under his sheets hiding from the world. He shouldn't have said anything. It was a mistake. What must Daniel be thinking? He must think he is a screw-up; that he has lost his mind.

Who could he be missing Kreese?

Who, in his right mind, would still be thinking about how good the past was alongside Kreese?

Who could miss that?

Johnny sometimes does that.

He misses the past, his golden era. He misses Kreese's proud smile. He misses what that meant to him even after all the hard training he had to endure and the pain that came with it. Because that smile meant he was worth it. And for decades nobody has thought he was worthy of love.

Now, that is different. Miguel loves him and he can feel his students love and respect. But Johnny is weak and he misses his past and all the glory he believes he had back then thanks to Kreese.

Daniel notices the way Johnny's body tenses. He is nervous and clearly uncomfortable. Probably, the man regrets telling Daniel about Kreese and feels ashamed. There is no shame in wanting to be loved but, of course, Daniel can't say that to Johnny. Talking to Johnny is still tricky and Daniel is well aware that he needs time to find his equilibrium and peace with the world and his own relationship with it.

Tonight, Johnny has given an important step and Daniel wants to honour his effort.

They wander and end in front of Johnny's building. They have been talking like everything is fine, bickering and laughing. Daniel loves spending his time with Johnny and he is sure the other enjoys this too. And Daniel wants to believe it is helping him. Their relationship has improved a lot since they started working together. Nothing is the same and it exists a nice comradeship between them; more than partnership or even friendship, much more.

Daniel can feel it.

Daniel can notice the nature of their relationship is deeper and going to something unexpected.

Daniel is tired of this uncertainty between them. Daniel can feel the tension growing when they are alone, the wanting shining in Johnny's eyes and how he bites his lower lip while they are talking. Daniel has seen the signs but nothing never happens. Johnny takes pride in himself every time he says he always takes the first step since he is not a coward. Nonetheless, he has never acted when he had the chance with Daniel which was driving him crazy. But now, Daniel thinks he understands why is that.

Johnny never loved Shannon or any other woman he has been with since what happened with Ali. When Johnny talks about that moment of his life, he always sounds hopeful like he misses it. And he probably does. He had Kreese back then, the only father figure he knows even now and who he misses. It is a mess. Daniel has known Johnny is a mess for a long time but this is new and more painful.

Johnny is stuck and finally, Daniel is grasping the surface of why he seems so incapable of going forward. Saying no to Kreese has been a huge step but not enough to leave the man behind for good.

And seeing Ali again has given him closure. But there is a part of Johnny who is stuck in the past by his present fears.

"Johnny," Daniel calls him. This can be a mistake, rushing things between them; but he has to do something. Daniel is a man of action and he is tired of waiting right now, after what Johnny has said to him. Johnny needs to know that it is fine. Being confused by his feelings towards Kreese is fine, there is nothing to feel guilty about. He is just a human being trying to survive. Knowing about Kreese changes nothing for Daniel. He loves the man. Daniel loves Johnny and wants what is best for him. Daniel wants Johnny to feel accepted. "I'm proud of you." He says softly.

Johnny wants to make a joke but he can't. He opens his mouth like an idiot without making any distinguishing sound. It is stupid. The words are stupid but they make Johnny feeling better. He bites his lips and gulps. The atmosphere changes and Johnny notices the intimacy growing between them. It is not the first time he feels like this, he is drowning. Johnny grabs Daniel's shirt.

What should he do next?

He can't let Daniel go.

He needs the man right now by his side.

No... he doesn't need Daniel. He wants Daniel.

Johnny wants to spend some more time with him.

He takes a long and deep breath. He can do this. He can invite Daniel to his house. This is the night. After hearing about Kreese, Daniel is still with him. He hasn't run or is looking at him like there is something completely rooted inside him. "Do you want to come inside?" Asks Johnny pointing at his house. "We can have a last drink."

Johnny has been dying to invite Daniel to his house but never found the courage to do it. Something was stopping him.

The truth.

Johnny has been thinking about telling him about his relationship with Kreese since that night but couldn't: the shame and guilt were always lurking behind every word. Johnny doesn’t know what has possessed tonight to finally be able to tell the truth to Daniel. Maybe he is just tired of being in the same place he has been since he was a teenager. And Johnny is starting to realize that he deserves better because he can be better. He clenches his fists and unclenches them several times in a weak attempt to relax. Daniel is still here, smiling like nothing has changed like everything is fine between them.

“Thanks.” He says after Johnny pours two whiskeys and gives one to Daniel. “This place is much better than the last time I came.” The last time Daniel entered his house he destroyed his door and the TV ended broken on the ground. Now, his place is cleaner and Johnny has been taking care of having a good place to live, he has bought new furniture, just in case Robby comes back.

Johnny sits next to Daniel. He is not sure what to do now. They have been building something for weeks and he is not talking about the dojo or any karate shit. There is something growing that Johnny wants to… but he is terrified. Since Ali, he has never allowed himself to feel like this before. He has run from any good thing he could have with another soul. He is not sure about what to do. He is not a coward but he is lost.

He is so lost lately...

who is he kidding?

He has been lost for years and now it is when he is heading in the right direction. And he is so out of habit that Johnny doesn't always trust his instincts towards doing the right thing. Johnny knows what he wants but is it tonight the right night? After what he said, is it the right thing to do?

Daniel is here.

Daniel is smiling next to him.

Daniel is bending over him slightly.

It feels like Daniel is inviting him, asking him to do something.

And Johnny wants to do it.

Johnny never acted before because he needed to talk about Kreese and what the man means to him. Johnny wanted Daniel to know where he is getting into; how screw he really is. And that is what Johnny did, finally, today. There are no dangerous secrets between them. He has put his cards on the table for Daniel to know him better. Johnny is terrified right now but he doesn't regret it. In fact, he feels lighter. The weight on his shoulder has disappeared and Johnny feels he can swim to the surface to be able to breathe freely after so much time.

"It's fine," Daniel murmurs. Johnny doesn't know what he means exactly but he is not going to waste more time trying to figure it out.

It is time to jump.

He has to make a leap of faith to know if Daniel feels the same way.

Johnny puts his hand on Daniel's neck and pushes him softly, making the space between them disappear. Their lips collide and Johnny believes for a second his heart is about to explode. He feels Daniel resting his hand on his chest, grabbing his t-shirt, deepening the kiss.

This feels right. Daniel moves eagerly towards Johnny and keeps kissing him. They have wanted this for a long time now. Johnny takes his jacket off and grabs his arms. Daniel is smaller but his body is fit and hard. Johnny moves his hands all way up to his neck. His skin is warm and soft. He has to fight the urge to say something hyper-masculine and, therefore, really stupid and inappropriate. The atmosphere is too intimate and it makes Johnny nervous; he needs to release that tension, but not by talking. He is not very good with words in moments like this and he doesn't want to ruin the moment. He abandons Daniel's lips and kisses him on his neck. The doubts echo inside his mind and he tries to suffocate them between kisses and moans. He moves Daniel who ends sitting astride over him. He accommodates him better and moves his hips.

Maybe, this is too much right now, Johnny is not sure.

When was the last time he had any intimacy bond with another person?

When was the last time he had a real relationship?

Daniel doesn't look like the kind of person who would sleep with anyone without being in a relationship. And they are not in one yet, strictly speaking.

Is he rushing things?

Does Daniel need more time?

Does he need more time?

Johnny doesn't want to stop. Stopping means thinking and he can't do that. Relationships are complicated for him who never fought to build something meaningful with another person. After Ali, he didn't want to try. And now he is completely lost but he has to fight for this, for Daniel.

Should he stop?

Johnny takes some seconds to look at Daniel.

Should he say something?

He loves Daniel but is he ready to say the words?

_I love you._

Three simple words. Johnny bites his lips and tries to figure it out what Daniel expects from him.

Daniel feels his nervousness and smiles in that way he makes the world stops. He caresses his check and Johnny forgets how to breathe. Daniel cups his face and gets closer to Johnny. Their faces almost touch. Daniel is taking control of the situation. Johnny needs reassurance from him.

"I love you." Daniel breathes against his lips. It is too soon for the words but Daniel has never been able to hide what he feels and Johnny needs to hear this. Johnny has to hear him saying the words. Daniel doesn't understand exactly how Kreese has affected Johnny but he knows Johnny has never had the chance to hear the words a lot during his life and Daniel wants to remedy that. Daniel moves Johnny's face even closer with his hands to look at him. "I love you." He repeats.

Daniel's doesn't expect Johnny to reciprocate his words right now. The man is a mess and he knows it. Johnny can be bold making the first move but, for what he knows now, Johnny is not very good with words and feelings. He is a man of action but it doesn't matter, they have time. Daniel doesn't let Johnny go. They keep looking at each other and Daniel keeps smiling. Everything is fine. Daniel opens his mouth to tell Johnny the words, to make him know he doesn't have to say anything, he doesn't have to force himself to say the words right now.

It is fine.

They have time.

"I... love you." The words can barely be heard by Daniel. The words almost drown in Johnny's throat but he pronounces them anyway. "I love..." Johnny chokes with the words.

“Hey, hey,” Daniel stops him with a smile. “It’s fine.” Daniel notices how Johnny’s body tenses and the way his chest goes up and down faster at every second. He needs to relax. There is no rush. Daniel realizes Johnny needs time to process what he just told him and what they are getting into; the two of them together will figure this out.

Johnny needs time to process what is like to be loved honestly and unconditionally.

He needs time and Daniel is going to give it to him.

“It’s fine,” he repeats quietly against his lips. “we have time.” They have time. “There is no need to rush things between us.” Johnny nods, his blue eyes glued to Daniel’s who notices his body relaxing under him. “We have time to figure this out.; to know what this is going.”

Johnny breathes better after his words. Daniel is right, there is no need to rush things. Johnny has time to enjoy this new period in his life. And now that he has told Daniel the truth about the nature of his relationship with Kreese, he feels better and lighter.

He is ready for this.

“I…” The words drown one more time on his throat. Johnny wants to be able to say the words to Daniel. He wants to be ready for this.

“Hey, hey… we are not in a hurry, we have time to figure this out, Kreese, Robby, the dojo, us… We have time. There is no rush” He keeps repeating. Daniel is right. However, Johnny doesn’t know how to do things in another way. He doesn’t know what Daniel expects from him. He is ready for. This shouldn't be this difficult, Johnny thinks. It should be easier to... "It's fine," Daniel murmurs with a soft voice. There is no rush. Daniel understands Johnny comes from a dark place and he needs time to face his own past with all his demons. Daniel can give him time to heal.

"I love you," Johnny repeats and this time his words are a bit louder. He is still drowning but he doesn't care. He has been feeling like this for decades and now he is reaching the surface. He wants to fight against his demons to free himself of the burden of his past decisions and experiences. It won't be easy but he has to try. He is exhausted of feeling sick and broken beyond repair. He wants to tell Daniel how he feels without feeling guilty or ashamed.

"There is no rush," Daniel says. He rests his hands on his chest that goes up and down a bit fast and the contact has a soothing effect on him. "We have time to figure this out," Daniel says with a soft smile. "We have time to figure everything out; us, the dojo, Kreese, Robby... everything. There is no rush." He repeats. "We have time." Daniel kisses him softly.

The kiss is slow and lazy. As Daniel as said, there is no rush. They have time to find their pace in which they feel comfortable. And Johnny is grateful for that. Johnny doesn't want the kiss to end. Has he ever felt like this? He is at peace with himself, having Daniel between his arms. And there is a certainty that everything is going to be fine eventually.

Daniel is the one who breaks the contact between their lips and smiles at him. He hasn't said anything yet but Johnny can read his thoughts. He doesn't want Daniel to leave. Daniel stands up and is opening his mouth to say something that Johnny doesn't want to hear.

"Can you stay the night?" He asks. It almost sounds like a plea. Johnny doesn't want Daniel to leave just yet. Johnny wants to feel his warm body against his.

"Of course." Daniel nods.

Later that night, when they are together in his bed, Johnny doesn't feel broken. He squeezes Daniel's body and feels hopeful about the future. His past mistakes, all the abuse he had to endure are still haunting him, but there is more than that in his life. He has the possibility of fixing his past decisions and he is more than the bad things that happened to him. He is much more than that.

"I love you." He breathes without knowing if Daniel is awake and able to hear the words but he doesn't care. They have time, he has time to repeat them over and over.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it! Comments and kudos are welcomed!!
> 
> And now, I want to get back to some old fics because I have some ideas to continue them.
> 
> Link to my tumblr as a writer: [Tumblr](https://the-hawk-eye-fics.tumblr.com/)


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